It’s been two months since my dad passed. Two months December 7th at 7:40. It’s not that I don’t grieve but the grieving is different thanks for most. Every 3 to 5 minutes my mom asks where jack is. When is he coming home. When can she go home. I just miss her. I miss my mom. And I am finding myself getting numb and sometimes nasty. Today was one of those days. I feel so hurt that she doesn’t show any emotion. I get it . I understand that the disease is the reason. I know it’s not her. I get all that. But I feel so angry sometimes. Like today. I want to grieve. I want to talk about him and remember him. But I can’t . All I can do is repeat 500 times a day that dad died two months ago. Groundhogs day. Broken record. Whatever you want to call it. I can’t stand hearing myself talk anymore. I don’t want to talk anymore. I just want silence. But that’s not gonna happen.
So tonight, alone, I will remember my dad in my own way. In the past four years since my moms sepsis took a lot of her memory, he and I became super close. And I miss him more than I can say. This isn’t really my art blog anymore. So unfollow if you like. I’m not sure why I continue here. But I will for me. And tomorrow and each month on the 7th at 7:40am , I will have a few moments of silence for my dad. Love you dad.....